Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Gary Roberts is the man...

Ok boys and girls, here's a lil' something Diego and I decided to do while drinking our faces off at the wonderful Cyrstal's in the Strip...Gary Roberts is one of the most feared players in the NHL (in our minds), and is bar none the most badass on our team (sorry big Georges, Gary's a pimp and playa...So here's some random facts we found out about Gary Roberts, and feel free to add your own in the comments section...The best ones will be posted in our bi-weekly Gary Roberts post, as well as the ones that us geniuses concoct...

(Pic from postgazette.com)

Don't let his calm demeanor fool you...

Gary Roberts' body temperature is 32 degrees, he is literally cold as ice...

Gary Roberts has no soul... he takes other people's

Gary Roberts doesn't use fabric softner because he likes the pain...

Gary Roberts will eat your kids...

When President Bush is in a quandry he calls Gary Roberts and asks him how he would handle the situation. The answer is always the same, "kick some serious a$$" (this is how the Iraq war really started)

Gary Roberts takes sh*ts that are bigger than you...

Gary Roberts has never wrote a check with his mouth that his a$$ couldn't cash...

Gary Roberts has never had a hat trick.. because no person, place, or thing can trick Gary Roberts. I mean no one!!

Gary Roberts can do enough sit ups to power the Mellon arena for the entire year...

If you look directly into Gary Roberts' eyes his cold stare will turn you to stone instantly...

Gary Roberts once got a 5 minute major game misconduct penalty for being a bad a$$ mofo...

Gary Roberts' age is listed as 42, but in all actuality he is immortal...

Gary Roberts can check you so hard your unborn children will feel it...

Gary Roberts' bones are made of pure titanium...

Contrary to popular belief, Gary doesn't wear pads...He's just that big...

Gary Roberts once tried to take off his skate and stab someone with it...

Gary Roberts sleeps standing up, with his eyes open...

A man once claimed he beat Gary Roberts in a fight... he was never heard from again...

Don't forget to add your comments, that's how we're gonna keep this thing goin'...there's only so many facts that the booze can bring out of us...

Until lata...


4 comments:

tecmo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
big snack said...

haha nice one bro...

BooBoo said...

Lemme know when he's bad enough to scare a coupla pucks into the net.

Big Snack said...

Hahaha he's almost as old as you booboo and he's still in the league...that's scary enough for me...plus he did just score his 900th point (granted it was in his 3,457,824th game)...