Friday, December 7, 2007

Top 10 Reasons to Hate the 2007 Patriots...

10. They run up the score...

Seriously going for it on 4th down when you already got the game well in hand? Leaving your all-pro QB in the game till the bitter end no matter what? It is just unnecessary for this team to constantly blow out opponents. If you have the game won why don’t you put in some backups? No wonder everyone outside of Boston hates you.

9. Randy Moss...

The knock on the Pats used to be that they didn’t really have a big name wide out for Brady to throw to, but that all changed in the off-season with the signing of crybaby Randy Moss. We all have heard the stories that Moss quit on his team in Oakland and then publicly cried about his situation until they released him. And we’ve all seen him pouting on the bench, but I guess he’s happy now that all he’s doing is catching TD’s from Tom Brady all day long. Once a jagoff always a jagoff, if you ask me, you shoulda went to Green Bay Moss, you suck at life!

(Pic from projo.com)

Randy Moss, role model to children everywhere...

8. The Patriots fans are annoying...

The only Pats fan I like is the dude from NFL network commercials, and he is imaginary. “How could I forget about the blonde bomba” As far as I’m concerned the rest of those annoyingly accented, clam chowder eating, bastards can kiss my as$. These fans are so obnoxious about their team it makes me sick. Half of them are probably just jumping on the bandwagon. We all know that the Red Sox are the most popular team in town anyway you fair-weather jerk offs. In an all out no holds barred brawl I would put my money on the Steeler nation any day of the week.

7. Their old balls linebackers...

Not only are the Pats linebackers older then dirt, but they also cheat. Vrabel is a whiner and all he does is take cheap shots, such as in the Cleveland game when he dove at the knees of tackle Joe Thomas with 11 seconds left in the game winning 34-17. Then there’s Ted Bruschi, who knows when he’ll have another steroid induced stroke, look at the size of his head and tell me he’s not on the juice. Finally, Junior Seau who ‘retired’ from the Dolphins only to sign with the Pats four days later. This guy has been playing for like 20 years, he probably wears depends during games so he doesn’t drop a JoePa in the middle of missing a tackle.

(Pic from cdn.news.aol.com)

Ooops, I crapped my pants!!!

6. Wes Welker’s creepy mustache...

I was watching sportscenter on Monday morning all hungover and BAM out of nowhere appears Wes Welker, and he was sporting what I believe is a pretty creepy ‘stache. Maybe he should try to call up Wannestadt and get a few pointers on growing a ‘stache like a real man, instead of like a 15 year old kid. Good thing Wes keeps his helmet on while he’s shown on TV cuz if he didn’t this mustache would be creeping people out across the country. Maybe Wes is just going for the Uncle Rico look, who knows? (note from Diego: me and Snack tried hard to find a pic of the stache but we failed miserably, if I were him I wouldn’t be taking pics of it either, so be sure to check it out Sunday during the game)

5. They’re cheaters...

Sure they say every team in the NFL does it they just don’t get caught…. Oh ya thanks for trying to rationalize your cheating for us, but remind me how many other teams have been busted taping opponents plays? That’s right it’s a big fat zero. The NFL is going to take away their first round pick, but if you ask me that’s just a slap on the wrist. Not only did they tape play calls from opponents but they’ve also been accused of paying out bounties if, for example, the defensive line holds a rusher under a certain amount of yardage, and the ref’s have been called out for making calls in there favor. How much help do these bastards need?

4. Rodney Harrison is an admitted cheater...

I suppose you can call Harrison the “tough guy” of the Patriots defense, he took over this roll after Ty Law left a few years back. Harrison is usually the one running his yapper, and he used to be able to back up his tough talk back in his younger days at least. Nowadays Harrison is past his prime and washed up, and I am assuming these are the reasons why he cheated and took HGH. Did you see that exchange between him and Raven’s coach Brian Billick on Monday night? I wish he would try some nonsense like with Mike Tomlin, who is only 10 months older then Harrison. Tomlin wouldn’t blow any kisses, but he probably would sprint at Harrison and Goldberg spear the sh*t out of him right there on the field.

3. Tom Brady and his illegitimate child...

The man can do no harm as a football player, but in real life Tom is known to get around. Now I’m not saying that Tom has any VD, but we already have evidence he doesn’t like to wrap it up. It would be nice for him to get some type of flare up before the game Sunday; it makes it harder to throw a football with itchy nuts and discharge. This dude has banged every model/actress in Hollywood… who’s next Britney?? I wouldn’t do it Tom you know she is fertile and I’m sure that child support to Bridget Moynahan is already taking a nice chunk of change out of your pocket. I agree with the WDVE morning show, if we are somehow losing in the 4th quarter we should bring out Leo DiCaprio to make out with his ex-lady, and Tom’s current main squeeze, Gisele on the sideline.

(Pic from people.com)

How are those sloppy seconds treatin' ya, Tom?

2. The media’s constant admiration of this team...

Every f’n network, it doesn’t matter which one it is, rides the d*ck of Tom Brady and his precious Pat’s, and it literally makes me want to puke. How annoying was it the week they played the Colts? We heard about this game nonstop for a week it was pretty frustrating. I am so sick of hearing about the Patriots week in and week out on every sports segment on TV, radio, and newspaper. Even during other team’s games announcers feel it is necessary to make references and comparisons to Brady and the Pats, it’s just ridiculous. I don’t remember the Colts getting this much attention when they were undefeated a few years ago. Also, I hate that humble pie crap that the Patriots try feeding to the media. You aren’t the underdog after you win 3 Super Bowls you a*sholes!

(Pic from viewimages.com)

President of the Tom Brady man-crush fan club...

1. Bill Bellichek and his stupid hoodie...

I think Bill Bellichicken (thanks Carl) is the most hated man in sports today. That is quite a bold proclamation, as there are convicted and accused felons, murders, rapists, drug dealers, thugs, and gangsters spread throughout professional sports. This dude is just an all around jagoff though, he wears that dumb hoodie every game, he always has that constipated look on his face, he talks with that monotone voice of his, he runs up the score on team’s, and he would barely even hug his own former offensive coordinator after he played him last year. I heard a rumor that even Bellichek’s own mother hates his guts. I can’t believe that people in Boston actually buy that freakin cut off hoodie he wears (not only buy it but its sold out everywhere). Whenever he is on the sideline he reminds me of some panhandler down on Liberty Ave begging for my pocket change.

(Pic from sportsillustrated.cnn.com)

A face not even a mother could love...


31 comments:

Anonymous said...

"The only Pats fan I like is the dude from NFL network commercials, and he is imaginary."

I love it.

I honestly think that the NFL started this campaign to get people to somehow like the Patriots and its fans since the rest of us, excluding the media, outside of New England hate them.

Anonymous said...

I actually think you're right nashville...There's no one outside of New England who likes those jagoffs, and as much as they used to embody all that was good in the NFL and now they stand for all that's wrong...Steroids and cheating...Hopefully they win all 16 games, then lose in the second round of the playoffs, so my boy Mercury Morris (or whoever that loudmouth old Dolphin is) can pop his bubbly and keep talking his trash...

Snuke said...

another anonymous tough guy...yea, they're ill...because they cheat (spygate), they cheat (harrison on hgh), and they get extraordinarily lucky calls (raiders game years ago, ravens game this year)...so no sir, you can suck my balls...I'd rather root for a team with history and tradition then some team that has everyone jumping on the bandwagon...and don't think your other titles are legit either...Hell, even the Falcons would be undefeated if they knew what defenses were being called...

Anonymous said...

hahahaha here's a picture of that clown with his constipated face and his hoodie.... enjoy

http://www.faniq.com/images/blog/Picture%2047(4).png

Anonymous said...

You are all just jealous cuzz yur teams cant play football for the life of them. The Patriots are better face it. && the thing about wes welker I am suree that none of your can grow a mustache so shut up.

Anonymous said...

O && any of you can message me and try to stick up for your teams but it doesnt matter what you say cause we have the best team since the dolphins so jump off the pats balls.&& We are very sorry that are linebackers are tougher then yours && much more stronger .. with out using the needles.

Snuke said...

first off one of your linebackers had a fucking steriod induced stroke at the age of like 32...that don't happen unless you're on some shit

second, you got CAUGHT CHEATING...oh thats right, it don't matter cause you're 15-0...

and finally, your coach looks like he has a permanent stick up his ass while o urs looks like the biggest player and pimp in the league...

Enjoy your fake ass 16-0...maybe next year we'll videotape your asses and take you to the woodshed...

Snuke said...

haha and you say since the dolphins...you mean since the 4-time champion steelers...biotch...you mofo's ain't there yet

Anonymous said...

HAH, as for number 2, enjoy the game on Saturday...you know, on NFL, NBC, and CBS.

I hope they hand the Giants their asses, and not because I don't respect that organization, but because they deserve this. They have had to listen to "jagoff"s like you all friggen season. Don't lie, you're actually LT still crying, aren't you?

Dude, I gotta hand it to you that you're funny as hell, however, you speak of things you don't know. Also, you're way too bitter -- clearly stemming from insane jealousy. Don't hate.

Also, this is only anonymous because I stumbled across this but care not to make a blog. Respond back and I'll send you my e-mail to duke this out. You don't scare me, Captain Bitter.

Snuke said...

Oh I know I'm bitter, but that's just how we are here in Pittsburgh...we always look for the darkest side of stuff...

To respond to you, maybe they deserve it, maybe they don't, but I think even without my obvious bias towards the Steelers, I'd still hate the Pats...

They used to be America's feel good story, but with spygate and everything they've become as bad as the hated Evil Empire in NY, and that's saying a lot...

Plus, the thing that really gets me most is how the media (i.e. those jagoffs in NY and Boston and the like)hangs off those guys' nuts...I mean honestly, have you ever seen the media have to "push" a dynasty like this?

I just think it obviously says somethin' that everyone and their mother who doesn't reside in Boston or isn't an OG Pats fan absolutely hates them (at least everyone that I know)...

Oh yeah, thanks for saying I'm funny...that means you can join my mom in the "Snack is the shit Fan Club"...HAHAHA

Anonymous said...

Didn't the Steelers have a few former players die from steroid use? Webster and Strelzyk?

Maybe you never heard of them since you've probably only been a Steelers fan for 3 years or so.

Didn't the Steelers have a lineman take a cheap shot at Carson Palmer's knee a few years back? Von Oelhoffen? Maybe you weren't a fan back then.

Don't the Steelers have guys on their roster with criminal pasts like dookie Davenport who was arrested yet again during this season?

The point? Hate the Pats all you want. But the guys you claim to love do all the same stuff. Except win.

Anonymous said...

Haa - reading this crap makes us within New England happy we are within NE.

Enjoy your miserable existence while we continue to enjoy winning baseball, winning football and winning basketball. Ohh, and that hockey team is about to run over competition soon. The fans here do let their teams go unsupported, we have 4 major sports, overpriced tickets and we go nuts at our Games.

Face it, you can hate the Pats and us all we want, but we support our teams and we have fun at the games, things like the Bleacher beach ball, Sweet Caroline, and the snow explosions were generated from the fans in the stands. Not the ones who sat in their basement lamenting their teams miserable existence.

Stay Classy Pierogi, This region is a sports fan paqradise – no better place to watch sports even when we are supporting losing teams. After all this is the city/region that chanted to the Philly 76ers, “Beat LA”, after they knocked the Celts out of the playoffs – in Boston.

Pierogi, remember to turn out the basement lights after you do your blogs, your mom’s electric bill is starting to piss her off. . .

dat dude said...

To all you pat's fans I would like to say a few things

your team cheats and your players cheat both proven points

your team has no class like, tom" I suck on taint" brady saying we don't care about records play games the mean nothing in the big picture of the season.you wrap up your seed like two or three weeks ago.

your fan didn't even realize there was a team in that god forsaken city of yours until like , i don't know 2001 so why don't you get off bradys balls. the only reason any one up there even cares is because your beloved Sox are out of season. Every one knows that The Mean street of boston is a baseball town.I hope it another 100 years before you win again.

And to that jagoff who believes that pittsburgh and philly are the same "city or region" It called mapquest, use it and get back at me. Find christ bra

tha friendly stranger said...

listen up u chowder head morons dont be mad cuz the steelers have won more super bowls then you and dont hate cuz our team has a loyal following all throughout the usa and all u have is a bunch of dickriding fans who couldn't even name 4 patriot players 8 years ago if any of u would ever try to come to hienz field you'd get ur ass kicked so fast that you would be too scared to ever speak a word about Steelers again everyone time you see black and gold for the rest of your life, it would make u shit ur pants... I should expect this kind of tough talk from you internet tough guys though

Anonymous said...

First off what heterosexual man bitches about a guy who bangs lots of women then, you're either jealous, gay or gay and jealous that Tom isnt impregnating you. Also say all you want but at least the patriots have never had a gay-ass quarterback with aids sores all over his face(Kordell,) never had a coach who cries after every time his team scores(Big Chin), never had a big fat dumpy running back called the Bus (terrible nickname). Your team is named after a stupid alloy, that barely even has any carbon and is easily pliable. Whereas our team is named after me and other American heros in the new england region. Lastly you're pretty close to New Jersey. So to sum up Pittsburg is terrible, Terry Bradshaw is bald, the deer hunter is a good movie, but thats because it was actually written by a bostonian and based on events which occurred in massachusetts, so shove your terrible towels up your vaginas. Im gonna go eat some babies then shoot steroids into my eyes while I impregnate 7 different women and not plan on marrying any of them. And Im going to illegally videotape it.

Anonymous said...

this whole blog is just ridiculous. 1, maybe 2, of your reasons are legitimate reasons to hate the patriots. wes welkers mustache? really? thats an issue for you? but you guys make it seem like our players are invading your houses and eating your babies. sure they run up the score, and had cheating incidents but they suffered the repercussions so get over it. believe it or not boston isn't only a baseball town. we are fans for all our teams, maybe some more than others, but who doesn't want to see their team excel? are you trying to say you wouldn't act the exact same way if your team was making history? your arguments are weak and ignorant so maybe you all should work on being a little less close minded and see the bigger picture...
patriots > steelers

Anonymous said...

Okayy so whoever made up those reasons to hate the patriots ovs. has no life. && Jealousy is a bad habit to get into so you might want to fix that.

Anonymous said...

I understand your hatred. I am a Red Sox fan too and can relate it to the Yanks. But, the Pats have been horrible in the past (I remember getting my heart broken as a 12 year old in the superbowl vs the Bears) and at least the Steelers have won before. The hatred for Belichick I dont understand. The media hypes up the Pats and he hates the media so actually you share something in common.

Anonymous said...

How lazy are you to use as one of your reasons for hating Belichick "he wears that dumb hoodie every game" and then right below add a picture without the hoodie? Uhhh, I guess not every game. But the fact that he wears a hoodie most games is enough to make him more hated that "accused felons, murders, rapists, druge dealers, thugs, and gangsters" Can't argue with that solid reaoning.

Anonymous said...

You forgot one...

Because they're the best team in the history of the NFL and light years ahead of YOUR crummy team, no matter who the frig they are.

Now go back to whining and secretly wishing you were Pats fan.

Snuke said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

hey dumbass steelers fan grow some ball hair and get a life. stop trying to feel better about yourself by proclaiming urself a badass steelers fan, cus ur not if all u can do is make excuses about why your team got blown away by the pats this year

MyShirtSucks.com said...

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JS said...

Dear Mr. Pierogisant: will you marry me?

Anonymous said...

First of all, I'm a Cowboy fan. I naturaly dislike the Steelers (Sorry but not realy). Anyway, The Patriots will NEVER be better than the Cowboys or even the Steelers. All I keep reading is some stupid Patriot fans mouthing off to some steeler fans and dont have $hit to back up what they say. Everyone knows they cheat, so don't try to stand up for yourselves. As someone mentioned above, you guys weren't $hit before 2001. The Cowboys have the most fans not only in the nation, but the world. We're Americas Team for a reason. Winning a superbowl undefeated has been done before (which you haven't done yet), so shut the F*ck up.

tha friendly stranger said...

haha i love it the patriots are the most polarizing team of all time... I can't wait till they loose next Sunday and to hear all the excuses you jerk offs come up with. I dont care how many teams u think "cheat" you are the only ones who got caught. Wait until Monday... there will be another top 10 that all you patriots fans and haters are all sure to love!

Anonymous said...

Hey The friendly stranger,
Jealousy Sucks, huh? Go Pats!

tha friendly stranger said...

greatest team ever huh? not so much haha looks like the Gmen rained on your little 19-0 parade, hey don't worry Pats fans theres always next year hahaha what a dissapointment it must be to win every game all year and then get worked over in the super bowl just like i said you would... and my fav part is tom brady laughing at Plax's prediction of "only 17 points?" ha kinda tough to throw TDs when your laying on your back all day eh Tom?... you scumbags were outplayed, outcoached, and out classed last night... must hurt deep down on the inside

Anonymous said...

Nicely said friendly stranger. There's no better way of putting it.

Anonymous said...

I live in Central MA and it's awfully quiet here...guess they're all busing choking on their humble pie. For all the bravado, the pompousness and arrogance, for the self imposed entitlement to championships..exactly the very things you claim you hate about The NYY and their fans... I hope Brady and his NYY hat is the start of an 86 year old curse. Screw you Pats Nation...Bet you $42 Million they won't be chanting 'Red Sox Suck' at the rally. It's called class, a$$-holes. CONGRATS BIG BLUE. You deserve every bit of this. Celebrate and Enjoy.

tha friendly stranger said...

funny i dont hear the pats fans talkin any smack now suckas 4 life plus u cheaters taped the Lers 4 times! haha looks like brady isn't so great when he doesnt know what defensive plays are coming