Orange Crushed

Time to shave those playoff beards...

Man do I wish I was at the Mellon Arena yesterday for game 5 versus the Philadelphia Flyers. Not only was that place rocking, but I also coulda avoided seeing those damn edge shaving cream and Dockers commercials 50 more freakin times.

Seriously though, it’s easy to nitpick about commercials when your team is completely dominating in a championship clinching game. I’m actually pretty happy the Penguins lost in game 4 because A) it was awesome winning in front of the home crowd and B) it gave all those Philly fans false hope that their team actually stood a chance against us. (Good thing Kimmo Timonen played yesterday) The Penguins did their best job of taking away what little hope Flyers fans did have left by scoring early and often yesterday.

Shave my face with a rusty razor...

So much for the Flyers being too psychical for the Penguins to handle. The Pens showed yesterday when they stick to their game plan the other team can’t match up; no matter what tactic they try. Not only did many players step up during this series with the Flyers, but the Pens also proved that they aren’t afraid to get psychical as well. Give the Flyers credit for making it this far though, I guess, as they were a horrible, horrible team last season. The Penguins just had too much firepower to be stopped.

Bow Down Philly

Everyone in the city of Pittsburgh was happy and celebrating last night as the Penguins return to the cup for the first time since Diego was just a wee lad in 1992; everyone except for the Penguins that is. I know its upsets the hockey gods if you touch the Prince of Wales trophy, but I definitely expected somewhat more of a celebration after the win. (guess these guys celebrate by scoring goals)

No bottle popping for this team though as the Pens were strictly business after the game. Now just like us the team will sit and wait to see who is ends up being best in the west. Note from Snack - my guess is the boys celebrated by hittin' up the local watering holes and shootin' it around with some puck bunnies. I mean really, they're 21 years old; how would you be celebrating?

More Pens Links

Crosby and Geno Malkin have a chance to accomplish something unheard of in the world of hockey, and even the world of sports, if they can manage to manage towin the Stanley Cup.

Hear Mike Lange every time your phone rings! Pens ringtones, what will they think of next?

Ever wonder what the Stanley Cup is made of? Find out the answer to that and anything else you could ever want to know about the Cup right here.

And finally, even more Stanley Cup folklore and myths (apparently there's even some ladies' names on it!)

Until lata...

Put the brooms away

Before I post Diego's post here, I (Big Snack) would personally like to thank PNA reader and friend Lance for shaving his playoff beard and making us lose last night. "But dude, I have a job interview" is not an acceptable excuse and may God have mercy on your soul. Sorry, it had to be said.

(Pic from d.yimg.com)

The Flyers got the job done...

Although the Flyers have looked inconsistent at best during these Eastern Conference Finals, they finally put together a complete effort last night, defeating the Penguins 4-2. The Flyers played their brand of hockey, slowing down the pace with lots of pushing and shoving after the play, and also working the puck low in the offensive zone while creating traffic in front of Fleury.

The zebras didn’t help us, calling the Penguins for 5 penalties in the first period that the Flyers utilized by scoring on 2 power plays. The Flyers also scored on a slap shot from Lupol, which deflected off defender Hal Gill’s stick into the net. Give the Flyers credit, though, they finally stopped talking about what they had to do to win, and actually did it. If the Flyers would have put this type of effort into game 3, then we might be going back to Pittsburgh with a split instead of up 3-1.

The Pens came out looking flat in this game, much like game 4 in New York against the Rangers.

This is something that can’t happen in game 5.

Coach Michael Therrien once again mixed up lines in the third period when he added Maxime Talbot to the Jordan Staal and Tyler Kennedy line. Therrien’s goal was to create more speed by adding Talbot to this line, and it paid off as Staal notched 2 goals in the 3rd period.

The series shifts back to Pittsburgh for game 5 on Sunday afternoon at the Igloo at 3PM. This one could get interesting as 34 minutes of penalties were dished out in the final minute of the game. Hatcher and Malone tangled, Talbot and Dowd engaged in some extra curricular activity, and even Sid the kid got into the mix with Mike Richards. Hopefully the Penguins put forth a more complete effort this Sunday so they can put the Flyers in their rear view mirror on the road to the Stanley Cup.

(Pic from d.yimg.com)

It's getting ugly up in here!

**PNA CONSPIRACY THEORY***

Thanks to my buddy Bobinkle for bringing this to my attention during the game last night. The Allegheny County Chief Executive, Dan Onorato, orchestrated a master plan to ensure the Penguins would be coming back to town for game 5. Why you might be asking yourself? Danny O wanted to rake in some extra cash money in the form of the 10% drink tax collecting off of all the beer sales at the Arena during game 5.

(Pic from media.philly.com)

Come on, gimmmeeee money!

NEWS AND NOTES

Where have you gone Geno? Since scoring two goals in game one he has been pretty quiet for the rest of the series. The Flyers seem to be zeroing in on him and punishing him every time he’s out on the ice. So far the game plan is working out for the Flyers, but hopefully he’ll break out for a huge game at home Sunday.

Is it possible that the PR staff loves the fans in the Burgh so much that they actually had the team throw game 4 so that they could win the Eastern Conference Final in front of a home crowd? You never know they do say the Pens are the most fan friendly teams in all of sports.…

Coach John Stevens said that both Kimmo Timonen and Braydon Coburn could return to the lineup for the Flyers on Sunday for game 5. I say bring them on, at least it will shut up the whining Flyers fans who complain about how’d they be winning if they were playing.

Guess the Flyers fans will just have to blame then next loss on the refs, they’ve gotten pretty good at crying about them too. I hate Philly.

Sure, we have our differences in Philadelphia and Pittsburgh (who am I kidding we hate each other). However, there is one thing we can agree one, the fact that Versus coverage of the NHL playoffs sucks. That camera angle they use on the power play makes me wanna throw up and don’t even get me started on the announcers…

Until lata...

Quickie for yinz...

Ok boys and girls, tonite is the night we've all been waiting for - the Pens have a chance to go to the Stanley Cup Finals for the first time since 1992. Faceoff is at 730ish tonite on Versus.

Look for Marian Hossa, Sid the Kid and Geno to keep their wonderful play up (Malkin's been slacking a little. but he put us on his shoulder for rounds 1 and 2 so I'll give him some love), and look for The Flower to get around 30 saves again; if those jagoff Flyers can even muster that many.

Personally, Snack thinks the Flyers are a beaten, worn down team. They've thrown all they have at us, and yet they haven't come within 2 goals of a victory. The Wachovia Center will be rockin', until the Pens score first that is, and then we all know how Philly will get - they'll kill their own team before they leave the building.

We'll have an update up tomorrow - until then GO PENS!!!

Some Links for ya...

Well that’s a 10-1 record thus far for the Penguins in the 2008 playoffs. With each win they rack up, the number of haters keeps growing.

Some local sports figures (and some sports figures in general) are jumping on the Pens' bandwagon. In the house were several Pirates, Big Ben, and former NHL draft pick Tom Glavine (drafted the same year as Scary Gary - now that's scary!), among other Braves and such (Chipper, Smoltz, and LaRoche to name a few). I guess Mario has about 20 tix to give to his celeb buddies every playoff game...

(Pic from post-gazette.com)

Have you ever wondered what famous people would look like if they were from our horrible, horrible city to the east? The X did, and here's the results.

Remember last year when we weren’t even sure if the Penguins were staying in town? What a difference a year makes?

(Pic from mondesishouse.blogspot.com)

Yep, the refs cheat for the Pens alright...

The Pirates actually have a shot at hitting .500 today if they can win both games of a double header against the Braves. Bleacher Report boldly gives you 5 reasons why the Bucco’s losing can end in 2008.

ESPN released it's May NFL Power Rankings, which take into account the draft. They must think pretty highly of our picks because we're seventh, even after losing Faneca and not adding a damn thing through free agency (except Hartwig, which was a decent pickup - I think).

And finally, the new trend in the NFL is having a pair of RB's, who share the workload and both produce. Mendenhall and Fast Willie have become a new dynamic duo in the Steelers backfield. Could be quite a 1-2 punch...

Until lata...

Top 10 Most Outrageous Statements Made on the Philadelphia Flyers Message Board

Since we have a nice two game lead in the Eastern Conference Finals against the hated Flyers, we figured we'd give you the best of them whining and complaining. These are messages all posted on the Flyers message board, and we thought we'd share them with ya just to show you how backwater, minor league, jagoff these guys really are.

So without further ado, here's the best of the best...

10. I don't know, I disagree with you Pittsburgh guys. I don't think he (Malkin) likes the physical play and the rowdy atmosphere...he literally doesn't like playing hockey in Philadelphia. Every guy prefers to play at home, but guys also like to play on the road in rowdy buildings..

Some guys embrace the intensity, some guys shy away from it.

I'm betting that Malkin shys away from it in games 3,4 and 6 (if there is one.)

(That being said, he's a phenominal player and I'm very much afraid of him, especially on the power play.)

Username: Bettman Sucks!

"The Penguins' Evgeni Malkin, on playing the Flyers in Philly: "When we play there, we have problems, like people throwing popcorn on the bench. I don't really like playing against them. I don't like that team." This is the quote this guy is referring to and I believe he’s taking it out of context. It doesn’t mean Geno is scared or will “shy away” in Philly. It means, just like everyone else here in Pittsburgh, he hates those douches and their band wagon jumping fans. If anything, he’s gonna be fired up in Philly, but certainly not scared. (like you are of Malkin, judging by that last line chief)

9. I am telling you guys that this is going to get the Flyers angry early and that's a very good thing. This team plays better when it is pi$$ed off.

Username: Chocula 78

Ohhhh we’re shaking in our boots here in Pittsburgh. This guy was referring to how every media outlet/ hockey writer under the sun has picked the Penguins to win this series. If anything, when the Flyers get pissed at the Pens skating circles around them they will just take cheap shots (as usual, Philly’s MO) and will take penalties, where they will be destroyed by our superior power play.

8. I'm not to worried, what will win this series for the Flyers will be heart. The Flyers have way more heart than the pens. Crosby is all about himself, Hossa is just looking for the next big payday and Malkin can't do it himself. Fleury hasn't seen scoring depth in the playoffs yet. I'm not even worried about the ref's, I hope the calls are a little in favor of the pens, it will make victory that much sweeter. The Flyers are the better team and we are the better fans

Username: Pat

Wow, not even sure where to start in picking this one apart. More heart, are you kidding me? If you really think heart is gonna win this series then you sir, are sadly mistaken. Crosby is all about himself? Is that why he has the most assists in the NHL playoffs with 12? Hossa is in it to win the cup and if he gets paid too I’m sure that wouldn’t hurt. As for Malkin he is a MVP candidate cuz he absolutely took over BY HIMSELF when Crosby went out with injury. I’ll get to Fleury later. Oh ya, Pens fans = greatest hockey fans in the league. (just check the NHL TV ratings and the fact we sold out every home game this year)

7. RE: Will there be any gloves dropped in this series?

Richards vs Crosby

Username: Pat (Snack wonders if this is the same jagoff as b4?

Saying Crosby will fight is asinine. Crosby isn’t a fighter, he’s a scorer and a passer. As for the original question, Flyers fans better hope there isn’t any dropped gloves cuz I don’t see anyone on that roster that’s stepping to Pens enforcer, and the most feared man in the NHL, Big Georges Laraque.

6. That entire article is completely biased. I'll bet Crosby was tickling his balls while he was writing it.. while Malkin was jerking it in the background..and Bettman filmed.

I love that the Flyers are the underdogs. There is nothing on this earth I love more then seeing the underdog prevail, which has already happened a few times this season for the Flyers. I just can't wait to see what happens with this series.

Username: DudeBrah87

I’m sure you do love underdogs seeing as how you’re a Philly fan and their teams are always considered the underdogs, cuz they suck. Don’t hate on us just cuz everyone including Scott Burnside (author of this article) know that the Pens are the better team, and that the Flyers aren’t even on our level. Get ready to get outmanned and outclassed - hey at least you made it this far that’s something to be proud of.

5. We went 5-3 against them in the regular season.

We can beat them.

Username: Eggplant

Sure, you just go ahead and keep on thinking that the playoffs are the same as the regular season. I don’t even need to respond to this one, a Pens fan posting on the Flyers message board already has done so, “your 1-3 against us with Hossa”. Looks like the Flyers ain’t been so hot against the Pens as of late anyway Eggplant. Lets remember Crosby didn’t even play in the final game in fear one of the Flyers player would cheap shot and injure him. (cuz they fear him)

4. The Flyers will win and thats that !! Unless the Reffs want to gift wrap the series for them and there "poster child" Cindy .. I dont have 1 worry im sorry . I worried when they were playing the Caps and they won , then I really worried when we had to play the habs and we beat them . Sorry but the Pens are just another practice series to get the boys ready for the Cup !!!!!!!!!

Username: THE KO KID

First off that’s some awesome grammar right there, good to see you never made it to the 8th grade graduation, KO KID. Calling him Cindy instead of Sidney? That is SO funny AND original.

How in god’s name you can be scared of the Caps and Habs is beyond me, but referring to playing us, as a “practice series”, is ludicrous. Obviously my man hasn’t been watching too many Penguins playoff games this year.

3. Crosby takes more dives then Michael Phelps

Username: Carter 17

I will give Carter 17 a few creative points for this one as I did kind of chuckle after reading it. I just think its funny how the default smack talk against the Pens is always “Crosby is a cry baby and he takes dives to get calls”. I guess fans just like to hate on the great players, just ask Lebron and the Papa John Crybaby T-shirts fiasco in the last series against the Wizards. The only diving Sid will do in this series is to celebrate when we send the Flyers home, and move on to the cup.

2. Martin Biron is a GOD.

Username: Carter 17

Did he win a couple playoff games? Sure he did, but to call him a god is a stretch. I guess they should be singing Biron’s praises in Philly though, because without him they probably would have lost in the first series against the Caps. Only problem is the Penguins are not the Caps, and we are the best offense in the NHL. Not to mention the fact that Fleury, and his two shut outs, has been better then Biron during the playoffs. Once he faces Geno, Sid, Hossa, Sykora, and Gonchar on the power play Biron will be wishing they woulda lost to the Caps in round one.

1. We have shut down all the other teams top lines. let me explain this to NO ONE is scared of crosby. Malkin is who we have to contain. Crosby and the pens we have the same problem that the Habs had. They will get plenty of shots from the outside that biron will handle with ease. Who on pitt will have the heart to get beat up in front of the net to get the hard-work goals. NO ONE...

Username: VengeanceNOW

So is this dude taking crazy pills or what? First off, you were correct in saying you should be worried about containing Malkin, because the kid is explosive. Secondly, Crosby is easily better then any player on the Flyers. Third, Malone will post up in front of the net all game long and there’s not a thing any Flyer can do about it. Lastly, as I have stated before it will come down to discipline. All you jagoffs in Philly do is take penalties and the Pens power play is too much for you to handle.

LETS GO PENS!! LETS GO PENS!!

Pens Link O Rama

Fear the Penguins, Doobie Doobie Doo. All Pittsburghers have a birthright of hating everything that is Philly. In my lifetime there has never been a greater commonwealth battle between the two cities then there is right now. This series is huge! I can’t wait to get the action underway, so here are some Pens articles to get you fired up and keep you busy before the big game on Friday night…

(Pic from farm4.static.flickr.com)

Let's get read to rumble...

The Post Gazzete’s Empty Netters has a TON of Penguins links and other good stuff. Check it out, well done, PG.

Anyone feel like talking some crap on some Flyers fans? (I know I do) You can do so at the Flyers message board. (I especially like the thread titled “OK I’ll admit it I’m worried, The Pens are pretty good”)

The Penguins own your soul!!!!!!

A Pens vs. Flyers recap from Fanhouse...

Sorry for being a hater Mr Therrien...

**NEWSFLASH**The Pens and Flyers hate each other.

(Pic from pittsburghlive.com)

If Downie plays in this series, he will once again get Rutuu'd

Note from Snack - I just went to the Flyers' website to figure out a lil info on Downie, and discovered their playoff motto; "Vengeance Now". Just when I thought these goons couldn't get any lower, they go and pull this crap. They'll get their vengeance alright - get their vengeance on a golf course in Philly that is. I mean honestly, who comes up with that as a playoff motto? It sounds like something straight out of Slap Shot (great movie), and I'm surprised the suits in Toronto even let this go.

Here's to hoping for a sweep, just to hehar them piss and moan about how Crosby takes dives and Darien Hatcher is a saint and we're the worst thing to ever happen to the NHL...Man I can't wait...

The Hockey Network shows that history points to a Penguins-Red Wings Stanley Cup Final this year.

Renderings of the new Pens arena are out today; eat your heart out Mellon Arena.

(Pic from pittsburghlive.com)

So that's what $290 million will buy you...

Pennsylvania is hockey heaven. So where is hockey hell? I'd say Idaho (Snack says Philly).

**NEWSFLASH** RJ Umberger is from Da Burgh.

(Pic from cache.daylife.com)

Hopefully we send back to Philly bloody...

And now some videos to pump you up -

Until lata...

Snack Attack

Today I feel the urge to go after two of my favorite topics - the Buccos and the F-ing Flyers. I'll start with our Buccos...

What the hell are you guys doing? All you're doing is giving us all hope that you can do something with the season, which we obviously all know you won't. Nasty Nnate McLouth is tearing the cover off the ball, which is a surprise to everybody but the Buccos apparently. Nady has played pretty well, and Bay isn't the complete jackass he was last year (still not up to par though) and even Doumit is hittin the ball well.

So where lies the problem? Where it always does, with our pitching. We had to swallow $11 million to get rid of Morris, Snell is playing like a pansy (he even says so), Duke will never be the hoss we thought he was, and Gorzo and Maholm have been up and down to say the least.

Hell, we only have three pitchers with ERAs under 4.00 - that's piss poor, and I would hope they'd be the first to admit that.

What I'm trying to get at, all you jagoffs I hear saying "Oh, the Buccos are hitting OK and they have a shot and..." should go and jump off the Bobby Clemente Bridge because it ain't gonna happen. Until there's a way for us to have the same amount of cash at our disposal as the Yankees or Sox, we'll always be a little back water team trying our best to play with the big boys.

Long story short, we still stink, so don't get all excited...(that being said Diego, Snack and lil' Snack are going to the ballgame tonite as long as we don't get rained upon)

My other topic for the day will be the hatred of this city for Philly and why this playoff series should be ALL we talk about in the sports world until the it's over. Anyone who wants to talk Steeler mini-camp or whatever else may be running through your heads can stop reading now, because odds are you won't see it here.

Anyway, back to Philly. We all know why we hate them. And it's a fact that we hate them. Therefore, I want to be the first to propose an "I hate Philly week", where we will make bets with our counterparts on the bad side of the state (I'm lookin at you Mayor Luke) and talk trash to them as they go drown their sorrows in NYC - you know, the city Philly wishes it was.

I think all of us faithful bloggers should make it our duty to talk trash on the city known for a cracked bell and a movie about AIDS. We should tell them, thru words (or fists - we all know Snack likes a brew ha ha), that they are no good, Santa booing bastards who will get a championship when they pry it out of our cold, dead hands.

You may be able to scare Washington and Montreal, but my boy SS Gill and Scary Gary will be waiting...Oh so, almost forgot about Big Georges...He'll be waiting too...

Until tomorrow, when we'll have some links and hopefully a recap of tonite's game for yinz (well, what we can remember anyway)

Go home Rangers, Bring on Philly - Random Steeler sightings

So your boys Snack and Diego somehow managed to snag 4 seats (thank you very much Lance Vance Dance) to the Pens game yesterday in the uber-exclusive Gold Circle section. Yes, we did at center ice, yes we did have a private row and TVs in our console in front of us, and yes, if we would have chosen to, we could have used our private waitress to snatch us some Ahrns if we wanted. So we were living the high life to say the least.

The game itself was a spectacle, and I've never heard Mellon Arena go crazy like it did after Hoss'a game winner. It was a crazy, loud game the entire time, and the OT thiller couldn't have ended any better (Snack would like to apologize to the little kid he grabbed and shook after the OT goal - my bad lil buddy, at least your dad didn't seem to care).

(Pic from postgazette.com)

Why the hell is there a Ranger fan in Row 1?

I know it's not much of a recap, but I figure by now everyone knows about the game and how it went. I do, however, have some interesting news that only someone in our section would know - Skippy Reed is a Pens fan!

Yes, the chubby, whiskey-swilling ladies man kicker for the Pittsburgh Steelers was spotted in the men's room at Mellon Arena by Diego and I. I was waiting in the line for a stall, I looked over my shoulder and saw Skippy in line next to me. Some jagoff across the bathroom starts yelling about Pitt hoops. and Skippy starts yelling about UNC hoops. Keep in mind, this is at the second intermission of a 2-2 elimination hockey playoff game.

My guess is, the SOB was so drunk he didn't know what sporting event he was at. But then again, wasn't yesterday the last day of mini-camp for the guys? He prolly didn't have time to get adequately ripped, so PNA's guess is he just lit up a fattie doobie and rolled his ass down there to cheer on whichever sports team he thought it was.

His not-as-drunk-but-still-a-drunk QB Ben Roethlissberger was down there as well, but unlike Skip, he had the brains/money to get good seats, and was spotted on the Jumbotron, not yelling with us commonfolk in the pisser.

All in all, it was a good afternoon of entertainment, and we're looking forward to seeing the Flyers next round. The Broad Street Bullies aren't nearly as tough as us, which I find absolutely hilarious seeing as we're a "finesse" team.

The series starts Friday at Mellon Arena - hopefully we can sneak our way into that one too...

Until lata...